OMG…… Is this the new sexual trend….

Pussy Pumping! Yep that’s right I said it! Now either you know what it is or you are sitting there wondering if I have some sexually charged Tourette’s aren’t you?


Well if you don’t know then let me enlighten, thrill and possibly scare you…

A pussy pump or as it’s called by posher people than us, a clitoral pump is basically the female equivalent of the penis pump which you may be familiar with from THAT Austin powers scene!

It’s basic structure consists of a cup usually larger than but the general shape of the vagina, made from silicone or rubber. A tube connects this to a hand pump which is usually a rubber type bulb you squeeze in the style of a nurse taking your blood pressure, except this nurse, Called ‘Fanny Pumps’ would be clad in PVC with her matronly mammaries hanging out in your face and muttering something like “Oh MY your pulse is THROBBING” Ooooo Matron!

Anyway…The idea is You place the cup over either just your Clitoris or your entire Labia, some also put it over their nipples but you may want a smaller version made for that, And you or someone else starts pumping.

 It’s worth putting a little warning here that the pussy pump should NEVER be used inside the vagina or at the opening of it, Why do you ask? 

Well, You know how some people can’t use the toilet on a plane because they have that irrational fear that they will sit on the loo and then get stuck to it and the suction will pull their insides out of them like some gory intestinal banner out the bottom of the plane while they die stuck to the loo? I’m not saying that’s exactly what would happen but still..Injuries could occur…

Back to the science stuff! After you or your sexy nurse helper starts pumping it will create a vacuum and that will encourage an increased blood flow to go straight to the vagina. This increased blood flow will tighten the skin the more suction is strengthened, causing it to become more sensitive. The clitoris will throb and the whole area may swell.

The pumps can be used pre-foreplay or even as foreplay.

Escorts both male and female have responded to the rise in pussy pump fans by offering it on their profiles, either to be used on them or by them.

Let’s just hope there is a gender neutral equivalent of the sexy nurses outfit for the gigolos and less stereotypically inclined ladies to use…Latex scrubs with ass less/crotchless bottoms maybe?